Before you enter this treacherous land full of Love Rivals and drama, you must prepare properly for your journey.

This is a list of things to pack before you ever set foot in K-drama land:

In your suitcase also should be the list of K-drama curses (listed on this blog) and K-drama Romance points. You will need both to make sure that 1. You make it out alive 2. You get the person you want to end up with. It is best to DUCK TAPE these in visible form on your suitcase. You may think “Oh I won’t need my suitcase while I’m there, I’ll find a place to stay easily”, but remember that people often move, leave, or shift a lot. This is the safest place to plaster it. be sure to leave it in a visible place where you can see it away from food, and use a laserjet printer when doing so. Have some back up copies as well on a few burned CDs in case it gets damaged.

You will need a Pink Shirt.
Make sure it’s light pink, and not fluorescent or you’ll get crucified. A dress/business shirt is best. Cotton is preferable. If you don’t have any or your local stores don’t carry those, try to find a light pink over sweater. Make sure it doesn’t have any pattern and is of solid color. If you are a girl, then bring it along and give it to the guy as part of a job interview or when he has to meet someone important. He will never object. Guys–don’t worry about being perceived as gay through wearing this shirt. It is one of your best tools to get whatever you want.

Next, add a Pink Tie to your list.
The best method though is the girl buys it for the guy and then fiddles with it later so it’s straight while the guy stays still. As one K-drama put it, it’s a “leash” to make sure the guy will always be yours. Light pink is again best, solid pattern doesn’t so much matter as long as it’s just pink. Be careful of red and pink ties. It’s just not good fashion sense. In Wedding the tie is a diagonal stripe with light and dark pink. However, one should note she took forever to actually snag the guy, so a solid pink tie might be best for less drama.

To all the men out there, remember to buy a dress, preferably light pink while the girl comes down the stairs or from another room. (Stairs is preferable). And remember to refuse at first the couple clothes, but give in later. This will surely defeat your nasty rival and give you a better chance at those Major Trump points.

Other things to consider bringing along:

A bullet proof vest (lightweight and one heavy weight if you find yourself in a melodrama is best), a good pair of heels that will break (for the ladies), binoculars (to ward off any fast-approaching cars), genuine 100% silver chopsticks and a spoon (to guard against poison) and a list of Korean superstitions (tape this also to the inner suitcase lid). All of which if mentioned will become true. (A book of Korean folktales might not hurt either, since being compared to some characters sometimes becomes true as well.)

Foreseeing common K-drama curses:

These curses include:
Amnesia, poison, leukemia, car accidents (usually you flying over the car while your significant other either finds out belatedly, watches you, or is waiting for you.)

Leukemia is the number one reason that people die in a K-drama. It’s a favorite. Though AIDS is also a concern, this is the one disease you have to throughly check before your arrival to make sure you don’t have it and after. You can do this by before, insisting on a full body scan, full blood work and checking your marrow. The tests will hurt like hell, but it will be worth it. Check for any cancer or other abnormalities too. You specifically want to look for the dreaded Philadelphia genes which are linked with leukemia where you will need a bone marrow transplant. After you arrive, don’t forget to offer to donate some marrow. They will screen you for leukemia and you won’t have to repeat said tests. Crossing into K-drama land is unsure which is why this must be done. It will also earn you points later.

To guard against AIDS you must donate blood to exclusively be used by yourself Be sure that the needle that the nurse inserts is from a new and sterilized package. Don’t accept less. You can’t be too careful when it comes to a fatal disease that no manner of medicine can cure. Getting tested before arriving might also be a good idea.

Amnesia is the next most common of the lot–while not always fatal, it is common. The best way to guard against this is to keep up a journal. It has worked in other country’s dramas, so it might work for a K-drama as well. Be sure to keep it every day and keep in mind that the guy/girl you like will most likely read it later. K-drama people are notoriously nosy. It has worked on Lost, which has a Korean actress in it whose crossed over and it also has worked in many Taiwanese dramas. Especially Prince who turned into a Frog which was filled with amnesia. Give it a shot for the Korean dramas too. It might work out for you later when you can’t remember anything.

Car accidents– bring binoculars, and a good set of lightweight bulletproof vest with you. Look both ways before crossing the street, around corners and especially look out for black cars– black sports cars are usually the people who put a hit out on you. A regular sedan or truck usually is an innocent bystander. (also usually black). If you can spot one by using binoculars in all FOUR directions (and don’t forget alleyways too.

The poison is fairly easy– buy yourself 100% silver chopsticks. Use them and a silver spoon at all costs. All k-dramas dictate that all superstitions are true. If they tarnish, then you know there is poison. And it will work once you get there.

Stray bullets has the words bulletproof vest on them. You shouldn’t worry is they think you are a fashion freak to have this necessary accessory. Don’t explain it to them either, they will find out later from the people around you why you wear it–even better get angry about it. If you have to explain it, make it short and to the point as possible, or risk it will fail in battle. try not to leave room for day dreaming or flashbacks. You might be dead before the end of the next week or so if you do that.

Upon Your arrival:

You need a place preferably in Seoul (If you don’t you will have to return to your “hometown” a lot which is just too tedious and expensive). Make sure though that you have a way to access a beach. The beach on Cheju Island is probably the best place to go with your significant other, though not necessary–any beach will do. However, Cheju worked for Goong, 18 v 29 and My Girl, so it might be a good place to think about. Forget the smaller Islands–those are usually used for melodramas, like Spring Waltz–and you saw how painful that was. So be sure you know your way to the beach. Mark off the nearest one and then Cheju. The success rate is higher with a car than a plane–a plane is too easy to miss and there are no cellphones allowed in K-dramas when there is an airport scene. Trust me, a car is better. When you arrive chase each other along the beach, throw each other in, and splash each other. Don’t just walk and enjoy the sunset–you will get cut from the race and fail to earn points that way.

Situate yourself near a hospital in case you get injured. Not all injuries are fatal, but it will cut down on your chance of mortality. Your loved one can then piggyback you to the hospital for things like high fever, stomach aches, discovery of being pregnant. The ones who have not been near a hospital have a higher rate of mortality in K-dramas, contracting things such a cancer in the time they are trying to get to the hospital. You can also use cellphones in hospitals in K-drama land, so don’t stress out, unlike the airport, you can pretty much use it all the time and get a signal too!

Last thing you need to remember, it rains. Yes! This is easy points and a great way to meet that special other person. An Umbrella scene is a must. If you lack your umbrella, someone else will have one. A guy tends to give a girl his umbrella more than the other way around–so guys bring one extra girls don’t bring any.

Other tips include never blackmailing and manipulating anyone you like save for when you have to become a maid, or are teasing someone because you secretly like them.

Last note: Never worry about a lack of a cellphone. Firstly the Korean cellphones will be better than whatever you have now, usually the standard K-drama one has Internet, a camera (cameras are essential in a phone), text messaging and a number of other things (plays music has games, etc). It’s not unusual for a guy to say, “You don’t have a cellphone in this day and age?” Then berate you, and then buy you one. Accept it only from the person you want to end up with. Accepting two or more just drags on the pain for longer (My Sister in Law is 19). It’s more common for guys to buy the girl a cellphone, but a few girls have done the reverse as well. Promising to pay them back never pans out, but offering won’t be a bad idea.

So good luck brave traveler! May you not be killed in your quest to find true love everlasting in this unpredictable land. If you fail, well, there is the next life where you can succeed… and no matter what your religion, according to Korean dramas you can be reborn!